Shooting Stars
by Gairi
Summary: Life is too short to take everything seriously. Commander Shepard doesn't seem to be getting this idea, but Jeff Moreau would swear by it. When she ends up assigned to his ship, they don't know how they'll ever get along. Each chapter is 500-words and based off a one-word prompt.
1. One: Crash

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Mass Effect or any of its characters, locations, or concepts. I make no profits from this endeavor.

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Caffeine withdrawal was setting in. The bridge was going to get a lot less happy if Joker didn't get his third cup of coffee. However, he really wasn't in the mood to get up and deal with the crutches and braces again.

Just as he was settling into his bad mood, the Commander walked up beside him and said hello.

"You need somethin', Commander?" Joker asked impatiently.

"Not really. Just wandering around while we're en route. I'd like to get to know the crew."

Joker turned around in his seat and gave the Commander a sarcastic smile. "Oh yeah? Well, hi."

She frowned at his reluctance. "You know what? I'm gonna get some coffee. You want some coffee?"

Joker scoffed. "I can see where this is going. You did a background check on me, didn't you? Well, I'll tell you the same thing I told the captain: you want me as your pilot. I'm not good. I'm not even great. I am _the_ _best_ damn helmsman in the Alliance Fleet. Top of my class in flight school – I earned that! All those commendations in my file – I earned every single one! They weren't given to me as charity for my disease! So don't play nurse to me. I can get my own damn coffee."

She stepped further into his field of view. "Sorry. Geez. I didn't even know you were sick."

"You mean… you mean you didn't know? Ah, crap." Joker groaned under his breath. "Okay. I've got Vrolik's Syndrome. Brittle bone disease? The bones in my legs never developed properly; they're basically hollow; too much force and they'll shatter. Even with crutches and my leg braces, it's hard to get around. One wrong step, and _CRACK!_ It's very dramatic." He waved his hand in the air emphatically. "But I've learned to manage my condition, Commander. Put the Normandy in my hands and I'll make her dance for you. Just don't ask me to get up and dance. Unless, y'know, you like the sound of snappin' shinbones."

"Well, I'm sorry I upset you by politely asking if you wanted coffee." The Commander said, leaning against the console and folding her arms. "I wasn't trying to insult your manliness."

"My manliness?" Joker repeated, looking up at the Commander with suspicious green eyes.

She smirked. "Mm-hmm. You seem like you want to be treated like someone who's strong and capable; not a cripple."

"I'm not a cripple!"

"I didn't say that. I said you don't want to be treated like one."

"Damn right I don't!"

"Exactly. That's why I _won't_ treat you that way. I'll treat you like any other member of my crew. So I'll ask you again: do you want coffee?"

Joker looked down. "Yeah."

"Good. I'll keep the pot on for you." She finished teasingly, walking away.

Before she got far, Joker turned and declared, "One cream, two sugars."

She smiled over her shoulder. "What's the magic word?"

"Uh, screw you?"

She laughed lightly. "Screw you…"

"…Commander."

"Much better."


	2. Two: Dim

**Two: Dim**

It was hard for the Commander to be in the Wards. Everything had a low reddish hue that made it difficult to see. She was in Chora's Den, looking for a man named Harkin, but she was so distracted by the scantily clad girls – some asari, some human – that were working in the club.

Shepard wasn't attracted to them, though some would assume so by the way she was staring. She felt sad for them, and she wished she could help them. However, she was fully aware that the choice to work in the sleazy bar was theirs alone. She had made that choice a few years ago, as well.

Almost eleven years had passed since she joined the Alliance. She was eighteen, and she wasn't even originally trying to sign up. She had been reporting the suicide of one of her friends, but she saw someone that she recognized, and he eventually talked her into joining. He gave Shepard what she needed – an intervention. She had been living an unsavory life that revolved around drugs, meaning that what money she could have made from a respectable job wouldn't pay for the lousy apartment she was renting _and_ her addiction. So she turned to waitressing in a strip club for credits, which only made the addiction worse.

It was only fitting that she join the Alliance after they had dragged her from the rubble of her idyllic home on Mindoir. She was one of less than a dozen people who had escaped the reach of the Batarian slavers who had assaulted the colony, and her parents were among the dead. She was only sixteen.

Her life had turned around completely when she was accepted into the military. The man who helped her join had proposed to her, and she said yes. But then, they were sent to Akuze, and everything was jolted upside-down. Thresher maws tore her team apart, including the man she loved. She was the only survivor, and even though she won a medal for her bravery, she felt empty inside. Those memories were even worse than the memories of Mindoir, if only because they were more recent in her mind.

She was taking medication for her anxiety, and she had emergency pills in case she ever had a panic attack in public. If she was alone, she could usually deal with it herself, but if she was in the public eye, the amount of people made her even more anxious. The anxiety medication had to be very specific, otherwise she would fall back into the patterns of addiction.

When Major Alenko placed his hand on the Commander's shoulder, she realized with a start that she had been staring at the girls for a while. Even though she knew she had a mission to attend to, the club made her feel… young. But weak, as well. She felt as if she was a misguided teenager again. Not the battle-ready Commander Shepard, but merely little Mara once more.


	3. Three: Tease

**Three: Tease**

"I'm telling you, Commander, this is why we shouldn't trust politicians." Williams shook her head. "Captain Anderson should be here."

"I know, Chief, but I can't do anything about it." Shepard replied, stopping at the bridge. "Joker, take us to the Artemis Tau cluster."

"Sure thing, Commander." Joker nodded. "Coordinates?"

"Here." She stood beside him and let him copy the coordinates from her omni-tool. When she stepped back, it occurred to him that he'd never seen her in her casual uniform – only her hardsuit. The uniform was too loose; it draped over her figure and didn't hug her curves at all. _So_ unflattering.

"Joker." Shepard quirked her eyebrows up at him, noticing where his pointed stare was directed. "The Artemis Tau cluster?"

He realized he'd been caught and immediately averted his eyes. "Uh, yeah. Got it." He typed in the coordinates and cleared his throat a couple times.

Ashley and Shepard glanced at each other knowingly, and the Gunnery Chief allowed a snort of laughter. "I'll be at my post, ma'am." She stated, walking out of the bridge.

Shepard nodded and glanced back at Joker. "Anything you'd like to get off your mind, Flight Lieutenant?" She asked pointedly.

Joker tugged his hat down over the tips of his ears, which were quickly turning a bright shade of pink. "I'm all set, Commander." He responded and sank down further into his chair, trying to evade her gaze.

"Mm-hmm." Shepard hummed knowingly, a smirk forming. "You know, all you have to do is ask, and I'll show them to you."

Joker couldn't tell if his face was on fire or if he was just blushing. "Wh-what?"

Shepard sauntered back into his view, thoroughly enjoying herself. "My medals." She replied innocently. "That's obviously what you were looking for, right?"

"Uh… yeah. Medals. They're cool." Joker muttered, switching on a few screens and attempting to look very busy. "We're, uh, we're all set, ma'am. You can go… do whatever… you do."

"You mean like saving the galaxy?"

"Yeah, that."

"You know you're blushing, right?"

Joker scowled up at her. "You're not helping."

"Oh, come on, Joker." She insisted. "It's nice. Wouldn't you play it up if someone was checking you out?"

"I was _not_ checking you out!" He protested. "I was trying to figure out why your uniform was a size too big."

"Ooh! Compliment after compliment!" Shepard said teasingly. "It _looked_ like you were checking me out."

"Well, I wasn't." Joker snapped. "Are you just gonna sit up here and bug me all day? 'Cause I've got stuff to do. You probably do too."

"Aww, we were getting along so well!"

"Commander, with all due respect, what dimension are you living in?"

"I could die on the next mission, you know." Shepard frowned. "I bet you'd miss me then."

Joker rolled his eyes. "You won't die, so I won't miss you."

"Okay, I get it." Shepard muttered, turning on her heel and leaving the bridge.

"See ya, Commander." Joker called sarcastically after her.

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_Reviews are really nice! I've only had one so far, but it made my whole day. If you like this, just say something simple. It really helps me out and lets me know that you guys are here._

_- Gairi_


	4. Four: Erratic

**Four: Erratic**

Joker was in the middle of surfing the extranet when it happened. Panic erupted in the Mako. Joker always kept the comm channel open in case he had to warn the Commander about going out of the operational range, but he wasn't really paying attention to it.

But then Garrus shouted.

Even though the sound was low, Joker could hear the word "thresher" as clearly as if it was yelled in the bridge. He raised the volume and sat up tensely as the sound of gunfire rang throughout the small rover. He switched the link to go to his earpiece, and listened intently as Shepard ordered Garrus to fire the rockets.

It was over just as quickly as it began. Not ten minutes had passed before the sound of heavy breathing came in over the comm.

"Is it gone?" Kaidan asked.

Joker could only assume someone was nodding, because he heard only silence. Shepard's voice was shaky as she gave her boys a command. "Go outside and disable that beacon. See if you can identify the troops."

"You coming, Commander?" Kaidan inquired.

"Negative." She responded. "Get going."

The sounds of scurrying and scuffling came from the comm, and Joker guessed that the two men were getting out. Shepard, on the other hand, banged at the side of the Mako and let out a shuddering exhale. "What is wrong with me today?" She hissed. "Get it together."

Her voice was low and trembling, and she was taking sharp breaths. "Travis… c'mon, help me out here." She whispered, so quiet that Joker almost couldn't hear her. It almost sounded like she was crying. But this was Commander Shepard. She didn't cry.

That wasn't just fear; that was trauma. Joker leaned back in his chair and let out the breath he'd been holding. However, Shepard heard the sigh, and she stopped muttering. "Joker?"

The helmsman knew he'd been caught. "Uh… yeah. Sorry. Comm channel was open, I just—"

"Were you listening?" She asked, her tone calmer now.

Joker rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Yeah. But I couldn't make out half of what you were sayin'… y'know, I'll just, uh, close the channel."

"Don't. Talk to me." She sounded so pleading when she said it.

Joker inwardly winced at her vulnerability. "If you want." He didn't know what to say, so he told her a joke. "What do you call it when a turian gets killed by a horrible spiky monster?"

"Friendly fire." Shepard answered, playing along.

He frowned. "You coulda stopped me, Commander."

"That one goes back to Shanxi." Shepard said. "You should get some new material."

"Well, why don't you try, then?" Joker urged with a smile.

"Not right now. Alenko and Vakarian are back. We're ready for pickup."

Disappointment flickered across Joker's features. "Sure thing, Commander. We're coming around now." He turned off the comm and warmed up the Normandy, readying her for a landing.

Shepard was the toughest girl Joker knew… but even she had her weaknesses.

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_Thank you guys for all your reviews! They made me happy, which made me write more, which means more chapters for you! Spread the love! Thanks so much. It's so much fun to say I have fans now. I can call you guys fans, right? :)_

_- Gairi_


	5. Five: Acid

**Five: Acid**

"We're on course for the Citadel, right?" Shepard asked.

Joker nodded. "I'll ask you to keep all arms and legs inside the ship for the duration of the flight. And no flash photography, even though I know you're dyin' to get a good shot of the most handsome pilot in Council Space."

"Most handsome, huh?" She repeated. "I think I can work with that."

He grinned, despite himself. It wasn't the reaction he was expecting from her, but it sounded pretty damn nice.

"So tell me: why does everyone call you Joker?" She inquired, and his mood dropped. He didn't like talking about himself at all, but Shepard just seemed to know how to push his buttons.

"It's a lot shorter than saying 'Alliance Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau'. Plus, I love to make little children laugh." He replied in a snarky, mocking voice.

"I was just thinking how much you remind me of Santa Claus." Shepard remarked.

Joker made a mental note that she could pull off sarcasm… _really _w_ell_. "Look, I didn't pick the name." He sighed as if he couldn't be inconvenienced with explaining it. "One of the instructors in flight school used to bug me about never smiling. She started calling me Joker, and it stuck."

"Why didn't you ever smile?" Shepard asked.

"Hey, I worked my ass of in flight school, Commander. The world isn't gonna hand you anything if you go around grinning like an idiot." Joker said icily. "By the end of the year, I was the best pilot in the Academy – even better than the instructors, and everybody knew it. They'd all gotten their asses kicked by the sickly kid with the creaky little legs. One guess who was smilin' at graduation."

"Eeesh, okay." She held her hands up as if to protect herself from his acerbic tone.

"Not sure why you care." Joker muttered, tapping some numbers on his console.

"I just wanted to get to know you better." Shepard maintained calmly.

"Well, I think it's my turn to ask questions." Joker said, giving her a hard stare. "What's _your _deal? All you ever talk about is me, but you're no Mother Theresa."

"You mean I'm _not _perfect? Ouch." Shepard joked half-heartedly.

Joker glared at her. "Fine, y'know what? I'll just leave it alone. I don't have to know anything."

"That's right. You don't." She replied, earning a surprised glance. "But my therapist said I should have friends, so I might as well start now."

"We're not friends." Joker snapped.

Shepard stared at him with inquisitive blue eyes. "Are we enemies?"

Joker shrugged. "We are if you don't think I can do my job."

"When did I say that, Moreau?" She demanded, the conversation taking a turn for the worse. "That's right. Not once."

"I didn't—"

"Just stop." Shepard interrupted, standing up sharply. "Forget it. I don't even care anymore."

"Well, flip out, why don't you?" Joker snapped back.

Shepard shook her head and walked away, leaving Joker annoyed and confused.


	6. Six: Soft

**Six: Soft**

The Commander was down in the mess making her breakfast when Joker walked in, looking for coffee.

"I didn't know you could cook, Commander" Kaidan commented. Joker rolled his eyes at Alenko's failed pickup line and turned the coffee pot on with a flick of his wrist.

"There was a culinary school on my colony. I learned some tricks there." Shepard answered cheerily.

"You're a colony kid?" Joker remarked in a surprised voice.

"Mm-hmm, I was for sixteen years. Then I lived on the Citadel until I was accepted into the Alliance." Shepard said. "Why?"

"Just didn't expect it." The coffee pot dinged and Joker fixed his cup quickly, then left the Lieutenant to continue his flirting… or whatever he thought it was.

"Hey, Joker. Wait up." Shepard called from behind him. She jogged up to meet him at the foot of the stairs, a plate of scrambled eggs in her hands. "I want to talk to you."

"Again? Didn't you yell at me enough yesterday?" He retorted, impatient to get back in his chair.

The Commander read his expression and waved him up the stairs. "I'll talk while you walk." She suggested, and he rolled his eyes subtly.

"It'll take me a while."

"Take your time." Shepard stated, much to his annoyance. "I know there's more to you than you let on, Joker. You've made it abundantly clear _what_ you are. I want to know _who_ you are. I don't care if it takes you ten minutes to get up the stairs."

He turned his head and glared at her, but when he saw the serious look in her eyes, his expression softened.

"You're different from anyone else I know." She continued. "I'd say what I really believe, but honestly, I think you'd whack me with your crutches."

Despite himself, Joker smiled. "Oh yeah? Why would I do that?"

"Because I don't think you'd like to be called a softie." She replied with a knowing smirk. "You work awfully hard to keep up that prickly exterior of yours."

"You're only _kind of_ right. If you weren't my commanding officer, I _would_ probably whack you with my crutches." He said, half kidding.

She followed him up to the bridge, where he finally put his crutches down where they usually rested at his feet and sat down in his chair.

"What I mean by all this," she said, "is that I'd like to start over with you. I don't think we got off on the right foot."

"Does this mean we have to play twenty questions again?" Joker asked, glancing up at her.

She pushed a bit of golden blonde hair from her eyes. "Sort of, but some things stay private. Does that work?"

Joker nodded slowly. "Yeah. We can start over, Commander."

"No titles today." Shepard declared, holding out her hand.

"Okay." Joker took her hand, which was smoother than he expected the hand of a soldier to be. "Jeff Moreau."

"Mara Shepard." She smiled brightly. "Nice to meet you."

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_A.N.: All this feedback is amazing! Thank you all so, so much. I love writing these two, and your comments help me revive my muse when it dies. The second half of the last chapter stuck out to me; it seemed like Mara got too defensive, too quickly. I have an alternate version that I may replace it with, but if you didn't see a problem, please send me a message or leave a review. I read and reply to all of them. Thanks millions for your continued support! It means the world to me.  
- Gairi_


	7. Seven: Hold

**Seven: Hold**

A sixteen year-old girl with warm blonde hair and sharp blue eyes was sitting on the front steps of her parents' house. She was chatting with her cousin on her omni-tool, still smiling from the vid he'd sent her a few minutes ago.

The tool pinged, alerting the girl to a new message. _[Shepard, W] You comin tonight?_

The girl typed out a reply. _[Shepard, M] Nope. Mom vetoed._

_[Shepard, W] Dang. We'll miss you._

Mara sighed. _[Shepard, M] I'll miss you too. I'll be sitting here, bored, while you have all the fun._

_[Shepard, W] Yeah. Maybe I can bring Kate and Josh and swing by OH GOD ALIENS KILLING US GO GO GO GET HELP RUN RU_

Mara inhaled sharply and tapped another message furiously. _[Shepard, M] Will? What's going on? Will?_

Then, she looked up at the sky to see several ships descending upon her colony, with alien pirates pouring out from the ones that had landed. People started screaming, and Mara covered her ears and closed her eyes tightly.

Then, the screaming turned into shouting, and she looked around again. She was older now, twenty-three, and she was on a planet she knew all too well. Her hair was slicked down over her forehead with sweat and not just a little bit of blood, places in her suit melted away by Thresher acid. She was running as fast as she could, but it wasn't enough. She fell down, and rolled over onto her back. She watched as her fiancé was ripped away from her and she screamed, tears streaming down her face and blurring her vision as she scrambled back up to her feet once more.

_Not Travis. Not Travis._

She was in denial, her despair deepening with every step. All she wanted was for him to hold her and wake her up, but she never felt his arms around her. She only felt the tightening grip of panic as it slowly enshrouded her, and she tripped once more, tumbling into a deep, dark pit. She tried to find the night vision on her helmet, but she couldn't. She felt desperately for the flashlight on her gun, but she had dropped it.

Then, the blackness all turned red, and a thousand images flashed across her eyes. War, fire, death, worlds without names, and sounds without words. They flickered and screamed in her mind, always the same furious red. Loss became trauma, which turned into fear, and fear was the catalyst to annihilation. She realized she was still falling, but instead of flailing around, she made herself still.

There was nothing to do except wait for the end… but the end never came. Only a woman, twenty-nine, with scars aplenty, gasping awake in the darkness of a small room in a quiet ship, was left behind in the chaos of life. Many said it was a miracle that she came out of it all with her mind intact.

But no one knew, save her alone, that she hadn't.


	8. Eight: Shackles

**Eight: Shackles**

_Springtime. Cherry blossoms. Cold. Handcuffs. C-Sec. Ankle restraints. Cops. Jail. Clubs. Dealers. Drinks._

Shepard took her fingers off the keyboard. "Why am I doing this?" She sighed at the woman on the other end of her vid chat.

"We need to discuss things that trigger your anxiety, Mara." The woman replied. "I'm having you write them so I can keep them in my database for reference. I'm noticing quite a few words relating to crime. Are those from your history?"

"Yeah, I was arrested a couple times." Shepard answered, rubbing the back of her neck. "It takes me back to when I was younger."

"You had to be placed in ankle restraints?" The woman inquired with an arched eyebrow.

"Once. I was pretty high." Shepard said, unwillingly recalling her criminal past.

"And the cherry blossoms?"

"Mindoir. It was spring when it happened. We had cherry trees outside our house."

"I see." The woman paused and made a few notes on her omni-tool. "I think you're purposefully avoiding the more serious triggers." She exhaled. "Can we talk about those?"

"I'm avoiding them for a reason, Dr. Richards." Shepard said firmly. "I don't want to bring them up."

"I need to know them, Mara." The doctor insisted. "We don't have to dwell on them. Just continue writing."

Shepard squeezed her eyes shut and returned to the keyboard, wishing that she didn't have so many damn triggers.

_Travis. Thresher. 78__th__._

"What's that?" The doctor interrupted.

"It was my unit on Akuze."

The doctor nodded. "I see. You're doing great."

Shepard didn't feel like it, but she kept typing anyway.

_Gangs. Slavers. Batarians._

"How long has it been since you've seen a batarian, Mara?" The doctor asked.

"Uh, I saw one on the Citadel last week." Shepard replied. "I did slow breathing and I tried to count to a hundred, but I stopped."

"You stopped?" The doctor repeated, making more notes. "At what number?"

"Eighty-six."

"You've mentioned that number before." The doctor remarked. "What's the significance?"

Mara fidgeted in her chair. "It was my address on Mindoir. When the house… collapsed… I was in the doorway and the number fell down next to me. It's the last thing I remember seeing before the soldiers dragged me out."

When the doctor grimaced, it was made clear that she didn't like listening to her patient's stories of trauma. "Okay. And did the Batarian on the Citadel try to speak to you?"

"No." Shepard shook her head. "He was just… there. Freaked me out."

"Okay. What about your other trigger words?"

_Home. Mom. Dad. _Mara paused. She didn't want to write the last one, but she knew that she had to. "I don't have to talk about this if I don't want to?" She asked, her forehead wrinkled with anxiety.

The therapist shook her head. "No. And this will end our session for today." She answered kindly.

"Okay." Mara flexed her fingers and slowly typed in the last word, her grim emotions surfacing with every keystroke.

_Love._

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_A.N.: Oh my gosh! A thousand views already! Milestone! I've posted two chapters tonight in honor of this. And this is the last Sad!Mara chapter for a little while, thankfully. Posting these together should help keep the depression to a minimum. More Joker is coming shortly, but I had to get some backstory down. As always, thank you all so much for your continued support! I love seeing how many people are reading and enjoying my work._


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